Hands-on Knowledge

“If you love me, you will obey my commands. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” – John 8:31b-32

When I was in college, I had a chemistry class. The chapter happened to be on chemical reactions and there was the formula for touch explosive there, along with information about the chemical reaction that caused the explosion. I called my brother, who was an avid fan of explosives and said,

“Dude, I know how to make touch explosive”.

His response? “It’s easier in deer hunting season.”

“Huh?” I thought… “What does he mean by that?”

He went on, “Yeah, the hardest to get chemical is then at Walmart, because people use it to cover their scent when hunting. Oh, and don’t make too much of it at one time, otherwise it can set itself off on the toaster oven and scare your roommate half to death.”

Who really knew touch explosive? Sure, I had read about it in a textbook and 100% of what I learned was factual, but I didn’t really understand it. I didn’t have the experience my brother had. I think that’s like a lot of believers today. There’s an understanding of God and a deep understanding of scripture, but nothing replaces that experiential practice of living out the word of God.

We want to know the truth before we act. We want God to convince us that what He’s told us to do is right, but Jesus said it doesn’t work like that… It’s only after you obey that you’ll understand. When you read a scripture, are you looking for more head knowledge? Are you looking for scriptures that say what you already believe? Or are you looking for answers for how to live? 

When you read about Abraham being told to sacrifice Isaac, are you glad He hasn’t asked you to do that, or do you search yourself for the things he is asking you to give up? The real power of the Gospel isn’t found in the words, but in the application and the obedience. We can say we know Christ like I thought when I read that formula in a textbook, or we can really get to know him, daily, with all of the reality and pain that entails.

My health has been deteriorating over the past couple weeks and I realized that my workload was the #1 thing I could do to fix it. There was really no way around the fact that I was doing too much stuff. The past two weeks, I have spent quite a bit of time telling people no. I have called to cancel a couple key contracts, including the one that was keeping our family financially afloat. It was good money but the stress and always-on hours inevitably occurred during my quiet time or on vacation. Carla has complained that many vacations had been ruined by it, and I struggled to delegate it. A phone call could be in multiple languages from multiple countries about anything from networking to system analysis to a crashed server, and unlike our website business, it was 100% on my shoulders. I knew it was bad when she said she would support me cutting the contract even if it meant moving into a smaller house or getting by without a personal car, but thank God for that kind of support.

I am again in a place where I need faith, again in a place where I am waiting for the Lord to break through. But instead of dreading that place, I think we should all greatly desire it. After all, when things are going well, I end up spending less time with God, and my prayers aren’t as fervent!

 

What Needs to be Crucified

 

Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Galatians 5:24-25

 

Those who belong to Christ have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires… Strong words! We have put to death our flesh and just live for Christ.

 

What am I supposed to listen to and what am I supposed to crucify? The more tired I become the more difficult it is to answer questions like this. The Godly and ungodly mix together in a haze of confusion for me. I think that I am trying to solve things once and for all but things aren’t like that. Am I supposed to rest of spend time with my family? Am I supposed to do work or train others to do it? Am I supposed to spend time with my family or spend time with God, or spend time with his people? How about this one - why do I spend so much time worried about doing the right thing, and kicking myself if I don’t? Maybe that is the desire that needs to be crucified.

 

Christ died so I don’t have to be perfect. Christ died so I don’t actually need to have all the answers. Instead of wallowing in my imperfection and indecision I can cling to His perfection and the knowledge that He’ll love me even if I make the wrong decisions.

Soaring Eagles or Flapping Birds?

I saw some eagles overhead today. They are big - you can't miss them. Sometimes they are close to the ground - other times they soar high in the air. But most interestingly for me, they rarely flap their wings. It's not like they are incapable of it. They just have other ways of flying. They know where the vents are, and the way the wind moves. They use these natural gusts and changes in the wind to fly. That's so smart - the alternative is flapping - working your tail off. 

 

I am a flapper. I work myself to the bone, trying to get somewhere by my own effort. And yes, it's worked! However, I am so tired, and the work never seems done. No matter how high I fly, there are others above me or other flapping harder. There is another way that doesn't depend on the flapping, but more depends on the wind. The alternative is to soar - to learn the ways of the eagles and how to be at the right time in the right place. It's a way I feel like I knew, and a way I need to get back to. 

 

The fact is that I AM guided by the spirit. The choices we make prove that we are moving by faith and not by sight. But for some reason I am addicted to flapping. Maybe I am tethered by the expectations of the other birds - they need to flap so I feel like I need to as well. Maybe I am comparing myself to the sparrows and the hummingbirds who yes, can fly, but no, don't have the same calling. And maybe I feel guilty when I profit and soar from something besides hard work. 

 

God, I give all of this to you. I give you my insecurity, my feeling of having to earn your grace or dig myself out of holes. I give you my need to compare myself to others - I want what you have for me. I have one person I can compare anything to and that is Jesus. And God, I release my personal expectations of ministry, following you, or of your call on my life. I just say Yes Lord - have your way, no matter how easy or hard that may be.

Chosing a Life of the Spirit

 

Are you so foolish? After beginning by means of the Spirit, are you now trying to finish by means of the flesh? Galatians 3:3

 

Galatians is all about living in the spirit vs living in the flesh. I think this can mean so many things, but for me right now it means that I’m trying to do things my way instead of letting God do things His way.

 

God didn’t choose me because of what I could do. Why now am I focused on doing for Him? God didn’t choose me because of who I could become; He loved me in spite of who I was. Why do I now think that I have to be a certain type of person?

 

Many believers are in a place like this. When they first get saved everything is new and different, and there is a trust and faith in God. There is a wonder and a trust in what the scriptures say. Years later, the fire has gone cold and everything is about your own action… Pray more, give more, serve more… But that’s not the gospel.

 

That wonder, the dependence on God, and the understanding of new mercies every day is a possibility for us now - if we would chose a life of the spirit instead of a life in the flesh.